Brain and thyroid cancer.

Hello Dr. Marie,

I'm so sad to say I lost my boy cancer last week. We first noticed a large growth on his neck--confirmed thyroid cancer but was incapsulated. An ultrasound revealed the cancer didn't appear to spread so I then proceeded to schedule surgery to have the thyroid tumor removed. About a week later, he developed a slight head tilt and uneasy gate--then had a terrifying seizure. An MRI revealed two cancers: one in his cerebellum; the other in the brain stem--obviously a bad prognosis. The neurologist quickly put him on Prednisone and Phenobarbital.

The first couple weeks were rough: he seemed high as a kite and quite wobbly. I was on the verge of putting him down but my vet said to wait overnight.

Miraculously he was a new dog in the morning--somewhat back to his old ways. Riley was swimming, playing; very aware and alert. I was SO thankful I waited! Of course he panted a lot; drank tons of water; and had an enormous appetite. But overall he truly appeared happy and content.

Approximately a month and a half passed and noticed a decline in his mood. His head tilt began to re-appear and was even more unstable as the days went on.

Here's the issue which is causing the most sorrow and guilt:

Due to stress, life, and logistics I forgot his medicine which was to be given twice a day.
He had a dose Friday morning then not another till Monday morning ( so, 2.5 days without medicine ). On Saturday I noticed an extreme head tilt and unusual gate. He was alert and was somewhat normal other than that. He remained in the same state Sunday. Monday morning came and I gave him his medication. He was definitely more unstable at this point--very wobbly. For the first time he didn't finish his food. I do believe he did in fact swallow his pills.

Midday Monday Riley threw up and was quite lethargic. I game home Monday night to find Riley on his side in a seizure. It appeared he bit his tongue and found blood, bile and urine nearby. I know he wasn't coming out of this seizure. All I could do was watch him die. I was so sad and in shock. He didn't acknowledge my presence--definitely near death. Our other three dogs witnessed the seizure and ultimately death.

I feel so sad and guilty for forgetting his medicine. Did he suffer? I know his death was inevitable and on borrowed time but feel as if I killed him? Did missing 2.5 days of medication really mask his illness? Was he days or weeks away from dying even if he was on his medication? It's ironic--I was going to put him down later that week. Did he know and not want to put me through that process? Did he have that sense? My vet did warn me the Prednisone would stop working at some point.

All I want to know is if he died without pain. According to the vet--probably not. The vet suspects his cancer was progressing rapidly and dogs do not feel pain during a seizure. It was so sad to see his breathing slow and then his last gasp of air.

I know Riley had a great life. He lived on a boat during the week; and in the wine country on a vineyard with pond on the weekends. His dearest companion, Bella, a Jack Russell Terrier, kept him young and entertained. He's been on a raw diet for three years and had the best care possible.

Wow!

Thanks for the quick reply. I feel a lot better.

Riley died on a Monday. Is it a coincidence or did Riley have the sense to know I was planning on putting him down the following Wednesday or Thursday?

My vet said she's heard that story many times--as if the dog doesn't want to put us through the pain? I was planning to hold him in the grass at home--would have been tough.

Thanks again for your help!